actor. (plural where applicable)

i am an actor. the various phases and faces of myself are nothing more than interchangeable masks, donned for the public eye. within each mask lies a facet of myself: sometimes positive, sometimes negative, often indescribable. it is on a rare occasion that you'll find me mask-less, naked to the public. bare-bones truth is scary. i know. i've seen mirrors. i've stood in front of one and, over the course of an hour, witnessed my mind's removal and placement of said masks. though subtle to the naked eye, the mind's eye records dire changes. the likes of doctor jekyll and mr. hyde. i've seen my eyes dim, turning an increasingly darker shade of brown until there was barely a shade's difference between that and black. i've felt the blood rush from the skin below my eyes, darkening to resemble what would appear to be sleep deprivation. though not blatantly obvious, people seem to notice the changes. they notice my dialect go from the typical subpar teenage colloquialisms to the well-versed, rennaisance-like elevated language. i think that my masks are a key part of the reason that i have such a good rapport with so many different kinds of people. i'm many different kinds of people. though i like to claim a subtle case of schizophrenia in public forums, i don't see that as the case at all. "a crazy person doesn't know they're crazy" right? i think so.
and so do i.

lmao.

"kvn....get. the. fuck. over. it."


that was a text message.

i have the best friends.

funk-fried rice.

today started crappy. i overslept again. bad thing to do when you have midterms to fail. fuck.
i get to school just in time for my 3rd period midterm. bright spot: i may have actually passed it. wizard. speaking of wizard, selena gomez's head is disconcertingly large. i'd post a pic, but i'd like to retain the few readers i do have perusing my corner. hm, speaking of corners, i noticed mi primo posted 3 new blogs in a row. cool. they usually prove to be a good read. good deal.

my cousin wants to go to the same college as me. she came over last night to get her hair twisted and it came up in conversation. it was odd because neither one of us had mentioned our college picks to the other before. i guess that just coincides with whatever freaky psycho bond they say we apparently have. w/e. (should've heard my mom, "AWWWW!!!!!!")

idk why, but i've been thinking about Her lately.not in the whole "holy-fuck-dude,-life-sucks-cuz-she-just-refuses-to-return-my-feelings" kind of way, but more like at the base level. like, we don't talk at all. ever. well, i have talked to her scarcely over the past two days, but that was for business. business don't count fool! lol, but yea...just kinda miss the whole friendship thing. i'd call her, but i never know when she's in the mood to talk or not. and i'm not much of a gambler. i do talk to her sibs seldomly though. the younger one more so because one of our classes are in the same area. she used to text me randomly but she just kind of stopped. i just noticed that. interesting. sort of. idk. i'm rambling. testees is premiering and i'm a bit distracted.

stroke of genius: i made fried rice for the first time ever. it was good. all i did was imitate what the hibachi guy at this restaurant did when he was making it in front of us, sans the flamboyant visual effects y acrobatics. the chicken i made for it was good too. prepared just the way hibachi guy did that too. i'm gonna try it a few more times using that method, then i'm going to gradually start tweaking and making it my own. awesome. here's a pic of it (yea, a pic...i was proud of it):

i have this pic idea that i want to come to fruition, but i need the 6 megapixel cam to do it. it's in mi madre's room. bollocks. maybe i should wait until my hair is done to do it. tired of the 'fro pics. if i don't get my hair twisted this weekend i just might cut it. i hate combing it.

i want some cheerios. yep. i wanna cheerio, for sho. chip-chastic cheerio of the honey-nut variety. if there's not enough milk i'm going to be hellaciously pissed. and i never say that word.
okay. moment of truth.


outty 5-stacks.

late night blogjam.

ATTENTION!!! NEW URL: http://UndergroundHero.blogspot.com

"See what I want so much, should never hurt this bad
Never did this before, thats what the virgin said
We've been generally warned, thats what the surgeon says
God talk to me now this is an emergency "
-Kanye West, Bittersweet

yea, that fits right about now...to an extent. (the 'god' part is still in the air)

anyways, to begin with...

Rebekka Guðleifsdóttir is amazing in a ridiculously awesome way.

her photography is awe-inspiring at it's worst. i know it seems like i'm laying it on kind of thick, and i admit that i'm still in discovery mode based on the fact that i only discovered her and her work about 5 hours ago. i guess it's refreshing to see some good photography besides my own, even if hers does make my heavily photoshopped pics seem like nothing special in the least. that just means there's much more progress to be made.

in other news...

jeez, i just remembered seeing one of my friends on picture day. she's ridiculously hot. lol, i remember i asked her out to a concert once last year. she said no, but it was some family thing (it sounded plausible). i think i may ask her out again. just for the sake of her hotness. is that shallow? yea, well i'm a guy. i'm entitled to it every now and again.

in OTHER news...

my phone is homo. i'll have only had it a year on 12/3 and it's already deteriorating. the down button is fail. the scroll wheel is like, on-again/off-again fail, and adding music to it is even more fail. i think it's time for an upgrade. i need to job myself quick so i can get some money. i'm still fiendin' for a voyager, but it's like $300+ since i'm still over a year away from my "new every 2" eligibility. my ace said that they do that on purpose to get more money. i agree.

lastly...

[Almost Famous] is just a few tracks away from being finished, at that point it will be ready for mixing and finally: premier!!! i really hope people like it, but based on the tracks that i've leaked so far i'm not too much worried about it. i hope i didn't just come off as conceited, because i (being my biggest critic) am well aware of the fact that there are a plethora of ways in which i can improve. the tape should be taken as an introduction to the potential greatness that is me. yea, my head got big there, lol.

whelp, that's it...


Outty 5g's.








p.s. hoping people like the new layout, it took forever to find one that i found suitable to my mindstate. there were others, but they didn't make the cut.

ADD. in practice.

i skipped school today. accidentally. i know what you're thinking, and yes. it was an accident. it started early this morning (around 6:30) when my mother came to the door bitching about how i didn't complete all of the chores that i was already 3 days late in completing. needless to say, she implied that i should finish them then, which i began to do, until she left ten minutes later. i abruptly dropped the mop and went back to sleep. i woke up at about 4p.m. whoops!

see? accident. it could happen to anyone. (with a budding sleep addiction)

sometimes i wonder what it is about me that makes me such a likable person. i mean, i'm not some sort of celebrity or anything, nor am i the most well-known by any means. it just seems that i don't get on many peoples' bad sides too often. i could go out on a vainly self-centered limb and say that it's my sheer awesomeness tha- (this is where i lost interest in this post)


hasta.

click.

my head is BANGIN right now. thinking heavily now. hm, i'm thinking that i'm gonna ask ---- out soon. a lot of people are suggesting i do so. then again, they said the same thing about Her when i liked (past-tense isn't concrete. yikes) her and it was obvious that that wasn't gonna be reciprocated in the slightest. of course they're two different people, and no two books are alike (except for reprints, but that's getting too technical). idk...that's something to ponder over music.

besides that, today was cool. only had to go to 1st and 2nd period (cuz they're dickwads and wouldn't sign my sheet). picture day was today and as our midterm in journalism class, we pretty much had to help her run the thing ('her' being the teacher). it wasn't really bad at all, except for the fact that most of the classes i had to pull for pictures were in the stupid trailers. and i had a thermal on. and timberlands. and it was warm out. i was sweaty most of the day. i don't like that much. i did enjoy missing classes though. that's always fun.

hm, all this thinking has got me all Colors-y and that calls for a nap. or sustenance.
ah well...
gotta start on this cd.
haven't had a CD request since 10th grade i think.


asldfkjal;fjlafkkjwlkjflakdveo;avcnaruaowincava;szdbn kj eo.


outty.

hombre del hierro (Iron Man, 'tard.)

i'm watchin it on demand.

for the second time.

y'know how it is on the second go 'round: you just skip around to all the best parts you saw on the first watch. it's like potent awesome.



afterwards i'm gonna go into the living room and make Badd Dancing Part VI

it's been a while.


O=5g's+1

pep rally. in theory.

let's get the obvious out of the way: class of '09 and '10 successfully hosted the, without a doubt, DULLEST "pep rally" the mill has ever seen. i can't believe the freshman and sophomores showed out more. hell, the sophomores actually got banned. they're not even getting pep rallies anymore. that's definitely not the case with us. the way we acted, they're probably dying for us to come back. i could hear myself talking the whole time, not a good sign. that's how quiet it was. you know what's ironic? us, the seniors, have been wanting to have a pep rally with the juniors for the longest right? now, when we finally get it, we just sit there. mr. davis (the most belligerent of all belligerent hardass assistant principals) got pied in the face. twice. now, they got hyped for that, of course, but right after that: *crickets*. they sat down again. lol, it was so horrible it's funny. at least the band, cheerleaders, etc... did well. plus i got some nice pics of mr. davis all pied up. during the second pep rally, i ran up to him after he got pied and said "how's it taste nigga?!" and didn't get in trouble. one of my friends taped it, idk if he got that part though. i'll check youtube later.

mr. davis "how's it taste?!"

if u leave.

this song is right.
MS + MJB = CLASSIC
had it on repeat for like an hour and a half now, still diggin it. ringtoned it too. (o yea, got the phone back).

this go-jam is wayyy better than *shudders* Radio. idk what he was thinking on that one.
he tried too hard to do that swag thing. he had some swanky tracks on luvanmusiq that were right.
my guess? someone gave him some bad advice.
shame.

o.5g.+1

nut-punch.

yea so i mentioned earlier that i'm not exactly on speaking terms with my grandma (the one i live with, not the one-that-fired-me one. not talkin to her either though.). idk if i wrote earlier, but my mom was in the hospital for a few days the week before last and it shook me up pretty bad. like really bad (when you're one parent away from being an orphan, you get overprotective). it was stress, it turns out. well my grandma was mad cuz i was late for school, and she was talkin all this 'this-and-that' shit and then she comes outta nowhere talkin about "don't let your tardiness be the reason your mama goes back to the hospital" and i'm like. WHAT. THE. FUCK. like, don't even play like that. the fact that she pulled some low shit like that is just coldblooded. she knows how i was while she was in the hospital and to do some shit like that is wrong. my lit teacher did that once when i turned a project in late. she said "what do you think your dad would think if he were alive?" and i'm like "shut the fuck up, you don't even know the man". idk...some shit just strikes my nerves. but yea, little bullshit quips like that earn the silent treatment.

still love her to death though, don't get me wrong.

ugh, this post is mucho bad vibes.

gonna up another post afte this.

outty 2.5k.
yea, ridin at half-mast with this one.