they say no one man should have all of that shit?

well i go, "but i'm not just one man, baby. i'm SCHIZO"

i find it ironic that every site under the sun (including WordPress) is blocked, yet blogspot isn't. maybe it's because blogspot fell off? i'm not sure. i could care less, though. i've found another creative outlet. the fuckery here runs rampant and i need a way to relieve the tension i amass every day from the massively collective group of fuckery-producing masses.......it's a lot of shit going on out here.

and just like that, my mind is blank.

now it isn't.

a few months ago (on another site), i wrote :

"The girl you love will never love you. She’s too busy waiting on the guy she loves to love her, but he never will. We’re all lined up single file, pining for the one in front of us, and imploring them to turn around.

I’m at the back of the line. "

well...now there's someone behind me (which is, in itself, beyond weird), and it's giving me a whole new sense of perspective. i'm literally not used to being the object of anyone's affections like this. sure i've had little moments and occurrences here and there, but it's different now. this girl really likes me, and i just kind of...well, plain and simple, i only like talking to her when i'm horny. quite fucked up, i know. that's where the insight comes in. like, what the fuck am i doing using this girl like i am? is this what it was like when i'd play do-boy to whatever girl had my heart (and my balls, it seems) in her palm?

i'm fuckin up.